Category Archives: Culture

Checking in on the New Year’s Resolutions

Culture, Family, Life

We are almost half-way through the new year (where does the time go!?). So how are my New Year’s Resolutions holding up? Actually, I’m pleased to say better than I imagined! Some are ongoing, but aside from #3 (finish items on my weekly To Do lists), I’m doing pretty well.

I have lost half of the 25 pounds I have set out to lose! I’m sure 1 or 2 might have been when I had my gallbladder out in March, but since May, my metabolism seems to operating faster. In addition to being able to drop pounds easily (perhaps a bit too easily), I’ve had way more energy, I’m sleeping less, and I’m not so darned tired all the time. I have been very diligent about choosing either mayonnaise OR cheese for my salads too, although that didn’t seem to matter until last month.

And while I haven’t learned to operate the TV yet, I have been embracing gadgets everywhere! Not literally, but I have not shied away from doing anything that involved “hardware”. Or wires.

But the biggest surprise to me was that I have decided to play the bassoon! This time, I will be careful so I don’t get any hand or repetitive motion injuries, and I actually have a goal in mind, so I think I’ll stick with it. Maybe if I’m lucky I’ll get a new bassoon out of it!

New Year’s Resolutions

Culture, Family, Life

I don’t usually “do” New Year’s Resolutions, because it always seems pointless to me to write up a list without any real intention of being able to check off things as being “done”. Not that I have never kept a New Year’s Resolution…well, actually, I don’t recall ever really keeping one.

I think it’s because I was doing it wrong. I think New Year’s Resolutions should be as practical as all of my To Do lists. Not that those are 100% practical; sometimes I have entries that get passed on from one list to the next until it’s going on 3 years that I haven’t completed a task I set out to do. (But I am going to address that matter too.)

So, with all due practicality in mind, here are my New Year’s Resolutions for 2014 in no particular order:

  1. Complete a workbook I got on how to be better in the workplace when you have Asperger’s.
  2. Lose the 25 pounds I gained after my grandmother’s death.
  3. Finish items on my weekly To Do lists.
  4. Complete the WWD modules.
  5. Learn another Sudoku trick.
  6. Play bassoon or sell the damn thing.
  7. Make 1 playable oboe reed.
  8. Go to at least 1 audition.
  9. Pick either mayonnaise OR cheese for my salads.
  10. Become a “gadget girl”, including learning how to operate the TV.

I think I have a really good chance of accomplishing these! Except maybe #3. I guess I’ll find out when I make up another list next year and see how many of these items I carry over to 2015.

40 things you WISH you could say at work…

Culture, Humour, Life

(Saw this on FB!)

40 things you WISH you could say at work…

1. I can see your point, but I still think you’re full of shit.
2. I don’t know what your problem is, but I’ll bet it’s hard to pronounce.
3. How about never? Is never good for you?
4. I see you’ve set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
5. I’m really easy to get along with once you people learn to worship me.
6. I’ll try being nicer if you’ll try being smarter.
7. I’m out of my mind, but feel free to leave a message.
8. I don’t work here. I’m a consultant.
9. It sounds like English, but I can’t understand a word you’re saying.
10. Ahhh…I see the screw-up fairy has visited us again.
11. I like you. You remind me of when I was young and stupid.
12. You are validating my inherent mistrust of strangers.
13. I have plenty of talent and vision. I just don’t give a damn.
14. I’m already visualizing the duct tape over your mouth.
15. I will always cherish the initial misconceptions I had about you.
16. Thank you. We’re all refreshed and challenged by your unique point of view.
17. The fact that no one understands you doesn’t mean you’re an artist.
18. Any connection between your reality and mine is purely coincidental.
19. What am I, flypaper for freaks!
20. I’m not being rude. You’re just insignificant.
21. It’s a thankless job, but I’ve got a lot of Karma to burn off.
22. Yes, I am an agent of Satan, but my duties are largely ceremonial.
23. And your crybaby whiny-butt opinion would be?
24. Do I look like a people person?
25. This isn’t an office, it’s Hell with fluorescent lighting.
26. I started out with nothing and still have most of it left.
27. Sarcasm is just one more service we offer.
28. If I throw a stick, will you leave?
29. Errors have been made. Others will be blamed.
30. Whatever kind of look you were going for, you missed.
31. I’m trying to imagine you with a personality.
32. A cubicle is just a padded cell without a door.
33. Can I trade this job for what’s behind door #1?
34. Too many freaks, not enough circuses.
35. Nice perfume. Must you marinate in it?
36. Chaos, panic, & disorder — my work here is done.
37. How do I set a laser printer to stun?
38. I thought I wanted a career — turns out I just wanted paychecks.
39. Sure, you came up with that idea.
40. I’d love to help you, but it’s 5:00 PM.